I run into him at the top of the stairs—I haven’t seem him since he ended things with me 3 weeks ago.
I believe when someone ends something on the phone—somatically our bodies don’t get it.
We have a kind and loving conversation about getting together before I go to Canada—but the entire time my physical body is processing the fact that there are no hugs—no kissing—no touch “This is the body I know!” it is yelling.
My brain is sighing as it’s been processing the break up for 3 weeks and goes, “Get with the program! This is not new news!” But my body didn’t get the memo until I was standing in front of him.
I leave and get into my Jeep and collapse into tears—deep waves of grief. My body has begun to grieve—it’s finally caught up.
I have 2 calls that afternoon in my calendar—one starting in 20 minutes.
I write 2 emails to the people in my calendar and express that their time and energy is important to me and that I respect agreements, them and my word but that I need to hold space for my body to grieve.
This is called adjusting an agreement.
Not breaking an agreement.
Adjusting is lovingly saying, “I know we had this agreement and I respect and honour you and your time—but, this is what I really need right now _____, can we reschedule?” All of my appointments wrote back compassionately and lovingly.
In our society we have been told as women to “leave it at the door”. Leading as women we get to redefine how we run our businesses.
This also means “not pushing through” in days of my cycle where I know I need rest.